In Bali... when you kindly attempt to ignore someone trying to sell you something on the street with a "Sorry, no thank you, no money..." they jump at the opportunity to exclaim one of their favorite expressions - "NO Money, NO Honey!" For the fortunate, the expression is delivered through a large giggling grin of rotten teeth :)
In Bali... as in most of SouthEast Asia, they don't use chopsticks, they to in fact have cutlery. Except, instead of the fork being the primary utensil, the spoon is the one that you bring to your mouth!
In Bali... mopeds are called "motorbikes." They are the most common means of transportation because they are relatively inexpensive, fuel-efficient, and faster to get around. They have no problem piling on tall cages of chickens, long stacks of lumber, or the full family of six (babies & toddlers included) and weaving leisurely in & out of traffic. You learn fast that driving your motorbike faster is actually safer. A surfboard strapped to the side, cows roaming the side of the roads, afternoon thunderstorms (along with them the imperative poncho flapping around), masses of trucks/cars/other motorbikes, and the occasionally large pothole only makes your 80 kilometer per hour daily commute more interesting!
In Bali... the police don't seem to care if you speed, drive in the middle of the road, or weave dangerously through traffic. When you come to a red light though make sure no matter what you don't roll one iota past the white strip on the ground for this is the 'worst' traffic violation you can make. If a cop walks over to you, grabs you by the shoulder, and tries to point you to the side just ignore him... and gun the accelerator when the light turns green. Trust me!
In Bali... the best way to get petrol (gasoline) isn't at the common gas station... No, it is from one of the locals at one of the unlimited huts along the side of the road where petrol is displayed and sold in 1 or 2 liter glass bottles (old Absolut Vodka being the bottle of choice) for 50 cents a liter. Just pull over next to the curb, fill up, and go!
In Bali... any occasion worthy of celebration involves fireworks. And The New Year happens to be a BIG occasion. Since arriving two weeks before the calendar change I've born witness every night, come rain or moonshine, the sight & sound of fireworks throughout the land. Come New Years Eve I don't think Disneyland could hold a candle to the eruption of light & smoke that took place!
In Bali... unless you are in an area that caters to foreigners, they use "squat toilets." Next to each is a large tub of water and a small pal. Most of the time there's no toilet paper. You simply uh, well, proceed with caution! FYI - That's why you don't shake with your left hand!
In Bali... they play crazy remixed techno club dance music in the grocery stores... Wether it is some psychological ploy to make you buy more or to keep the high ratio of workers to shoppers from falling asleep at the check out stand I can't say. But what I do know is that when you're walking down the aisle to grab a snack you just can't help but bust out a robot move or two!
In Bali... they figured out a way to keep the cost of movie cinemas way down... They just don't have'um! And, why would they when for $1 you can buy any movie you want (including just released pictures) at one of the numerous DVD stands in every town? So they might skip/freeze on you, or the profile of a person getting up and crossing screen occurs half way through the flick... Oh well!
In Bali... there are many foreigners: Mostly Japanese and Australian tourists. Whenever you meet a local they inevitably ask you two questions: 'What is your name?' and 'Where are you from?' To the first my reply is "Natan" as the "th" sound just doesn't work in Bahasa. To the second I say "Guess!??" So far 5 out of 5 times the guess is Mexico! Mexico!?! When I laugh and ask after if they've ever met (or even heard of) a visitor from Mexico in Bali they smile and offer a simple - "Well, no!" My ability to elude continues...
